Having allergies is not funny, but a bit of dark humour every now and then never goes amiss. I had the idea for an allergy joke blog post when I saw the following joke in a recent copy of Readers Digest:
Q) Did you hear about the Frenchman who could only count to seven?
A) He had a huit allergy.
It brought a smile to my face and made me think about how many other allergy jokes I know, and there aren’t many. I did find one for all you cat allergy sufferers out there.
A picture of a cat wearing a dress spotted hanging in an allergy clinic with the following caption: We got rid of the kids, the cat was allergic. Visit Atchoo Allergy blog if you want to see a picture of the cat.
I found some more pretty cheesy ones on The Allergy Asthma and Immunology Society’s joke page:
Old Song Title: Blowin’ In The Wind by Peter Pollen Mary
Humans and bees have something in common – hives!
Another way to say that medications for allergic diseases are expensive: Robbing Peter to pay for Pollen
Not many of these jokes are really that funny; there seems to be a serious lack of good allergy jokes. I know it is definitely not a laughing matter; people die every year from allergies so it is serious but a bit of humour goes a long way and laughter is definitely a good medicine. If you can laugh at yourself you will find it easier to cope with the every day challenge of living with life threatening allergies.
I made this one up based on an actual experience that I had myself. I was in stitches but the waiter had no idea why I was laughing.
An allergy sufferer went into their local restaurant for a meal and asked the waiter, “I have a nut and dairy allergy, can you tell me how this meal is cooked?”
“Oh yes,” says the waiter, smiling helpfully, “It’s cooked in a Wok!”
A long time ago I went to see comedian Milton Jones performing live and have always remembered one of his jokes. He did a sketch based on a gag about his schoolmates who, knowing he has a potentially fatal peanut allergy, force him to play Russian Roulette with a packet of Revels. I can remember eating these as a child, and I soon found out how to tell which contained peanuts in order to avoid them. This was before the days of Epipens; I just knew peanuts made me sick and didn’t eat them. If you’ve never had Revels before they are chocolate covered snacks which contain different centres: orange, peanut, coffee, maltesar, toffee, chocolate and raisin. Everyone has their favourite flavour and the makers of Revels have created a very funny campaign around that very idea. You can view a clip of this recent advert here.
If you are allergic to bananas you might like this joke from the Peanut Allergy forum:
As part of the admission procedure in the hospital where I work, I ask the patients if they are allergic to anything. If they are, I print it on an allergy band placed on the patients’ wrists. Once when I asked an elderly woman if she had any allergies, she said she couldn’t eat bananas. Imagine my surprise when several hours later a very irate son came out to the nurses’ station demanding, “Who’s responsible for labelling my mother ‘bananas’?”
This next one is my husband’s contribution so I take no responsibility:
A man walks into a charity shop looking for a pair of trousers. The label inside declares, “May contain traces of nuts.
I would love to hear from anyone who has any other good allergy jokes, and if I find any more I’ll add them to this post. Keep smiling ;o)