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Living in fear of your allergies

25/04/2015 by Ruth Holroyd 1 Comment

Nobody should be living in fear, it’s not a nice place to be. Believe me, I’ve been there. I have spent years too frightened to eat out. Scared people will laugh at me or think I’m a freak. Fearful that I will stand out, cause a fuss, be a pain in the allergic backside.

But that’s all stopping now. Since last year when I decided I was going to demand better and not hide behind anaphylaxis as a reason to not join in, explore, ask for a safe meal etc. I’m getting out there and mostly I’m enjoying the ride. I’ve been abroad on my own and had a fantastic business trip in Copenhagen, eating out in some amazing restaurants. I’ve tried new places here in the UK and have been very pleasantly surprised on the whole. Give me Ham, egg and chips or steak and I’ll be more than happy. Offer me something a little more adventurous and I’ll be your number one fan and visit often with all my friends and family.

So far I’ve been fine but I’ve had a few minor reactions along the way. I won’t lie and say it’s been easy because it hasn’t but what I have learnt is that most people are kind, most people will listen and take your allergies seriously and when they don’t you can usually tell.

Look for the sighs. The eye roll. The tsk tsk. The impatient look. The comments like, “What can you eat? Fresh air? Dust?”

Well no actually, I can’t eat dust either because I’m allergic to that too!

It's Allergy Awareness Week so I wanted to talk about living with fear
It’s Allergy Awareness Week so I wanted to talk about living with fear

What scares me more than having a life threatening allergy is ignorance. People in positions of power, like waiters, chefs and restaurant managers who don’t take allergies seriously. Allergies and anaphylaxis can be potentially life threatening but it’s not rocket science to help me choose a safe meal and to ensure the kitchen is clean to avoid cross contamination.

Failing to take allergies seriously is very dangerous.
Treating people with allergies with disdain breeds poor allergy awareness.
Discrimination spreads the opinion that it’s not that bad really. That maybe we just get a bit of a runny nose or a tummy upset.

Some people don’t get it until they’ve seen someone having full blown anaphylaxis.
Some people don’t really understand until they’ve put me in A&E. They usually just didn’t quite realise either what dairy was, which allergens were the issue, how bad it could be. But if anyone says they are allergic to something, whether it is a mild allergy or not, don’t take the risk. Take it seriously. Because now two reactions are the same – what was mild once can turn nasty the next time. Allergic reactions worsen with each exposure.

Ask questions, check if you’re not sure. But never assume. Get the facts and take allergies seriously.

Don’t be one of those people who doesn’t care.
Who says something like, “Oh you’ll be fine.” or “This should be OK.” without checking.
Listen, ask us how bad our allergy is, please take us seriously. Always check something if you are not sure.

We are not lying. We are just trying to live our lives and take part in all the stuff most people take for granted.

If you are reading this and you don’t understand what anaphylaxis is, visit the Anaphylaxis Campaign website for all the information you could possibly need.

On one final note, one of the things I fear most of all is peanuts in public places and the peanut kiss. They get everywhere. I can smell them a mile off and then I’m on hyper alert to gauge whose eating them and who potential might be about to plaster me with the dust of the stuff.

So please be aware of allergens. Listen when people say they have them.
Be nice, be kind and spread a positive attitude towards allergies.

What do you live in fear of? If you have allergies that can cause anaphylaxis, what are your biggest fears?

Related posts:

Cross reactivity between snail allergy and dust mite allergySnail allergy cross reaction with dust mite allergy Dust mask for avoiding airborne allergensSurviving house renovations with a dust allergy Testing the new Dyson V8 with a dust allergy

Filed Under: Allergies, Mental Health Tagged With: allergy awareness, Allergy Awareness Week, allergy discrimination, cross contamination, eating out with allergies, Living in fear of allergies, living with allergies, Living with anaphylaxis

About Ruth Holroyd

Author of 'Anaphylaxis: The Essential Guide: An Action Plan For Living With Life-Threatening Allergies' and 'The Shape of Skin, both available as paperback or Kindle on Amazon. Ruth is a Writer, Blogger and Patient Expert in allergies, asthma, anaphylaxis, eczema and topical steroid withdrawal.

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  1. Allergy Awareness Week says:
    28/04/2015 at 8:51 am

    […] might also want to take a look at Ruth’s blog at What Allergy? If anyone knows about living with fear it must be Ruth, with life threatening allergies to peanuts, […]

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Hi I'm Ruth. I've grown up with eczema and multiple life-threatening allergies and collected more as I've got older.  It started with a peanut allergy and now I'm allergic to milk, wheat, soya and many more. In this blog I share tips, advice and things I've learnt living with allergies, asthma and eczema with a focus on topical steroid withdrawal. You can buy my books, which are brilliant by the way! The first is Anaphylaxis: The essential guide and the second, The Shape of Skin, healing poems for eczema and sensitive skin. The reviews speak for themselves. If you want to chat you can find me on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn (links below). Do get in touch. And please comment on blogs, it makes a humble blogger do a little happy dance!

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